Truth Teller

I know words. I have the best words. But unlike the presumptive Republican nominee, I am not averse to using them. So, here we go:

Donald Trump is a floccinaucinihilipilificating hippopotomonstrosesquipedaliophobic pseudopseudoantidisestablishmentarianist.

How is that for a crushing denunciation?

Wait . . . back up . . .

When I was in the 3rd Grade, I learned that the longest word in the English language was “antidisestablishmentarianism”. Being a young school kid and having no Wikipedia to fact check, I just assumed what my teacher told me was true.

All of the recent political talk about “the establishment” made me remember this childhood lesson, which, in turn, got me google researching (or “research googling?”). I discovered that either Mrs. Peterson was wrong, or that her choice for the longest word has since slipped in the rankings to 9th Place. On closer examination, though, there seems to have been a lot of cheating going on.

I hereby reject Numbers 1-4 for being too absurdly scientific, not to mention “coined” for the purpose of making it into the charts. They are the linguistic equivalents of a boy band. Number 6 (“supercalifragi . . .”) gets the boot because you have to sing that one, not say it. Number 7 invalidates itself by beginning with “pseudopseudo-“. Mrs. Peterson’s word is now in third place. The two above it are both facetious, but not enough so to be tossed off the list. One of them even passes muster with my Spellchecker.

“Hippopotomonstrosesquipedaliophobia” is, ironically, the fear of long words.

“Floccinaucinihilipilification” is the act or habit of describing or regarding something as unimportant, of having no value or being worthless.

Which brings me back to Donald Trump. Both of these words seem to apply to him – to his clear preference for using words of the four-or-five-letter variety to declare everyone other than himself as unimportant or worthless. If anyone doesn’t believe that, they can ask Little Marco, Lying Ted, Crooked Hillary, Pussy Bernie, the Stupid State Department or the useless editorial board of that old rag, The New York Times. So, two of the three longest words in the English language apply to Trump. The question remains if he is also an antidisestablishmentarianist.

I think so.

For all his establishment bashing, he did join a party and is currently making nice with its members. All that other stuff was window-dressing. He will not be changing the “stupid” system now that it is working for him. On the other hand – all this making nice is probably opportunistic – so a “pseudoantidis . . .”. And seeing as how he has proven to be a pathological liar, I’ll add one more “pseudo-“ for good measure.

There you have it.

Donald Trump is a floccinaucinihilipilificating hippopotomonstrosesquipedaliophobic pseudopseudoantidisestablishmentarianist.

the best words

What is the conclusion of all of this? Well, if you judge a thing’s value on the basis of its length – and I think he does – then Donald Trump truly does own the three best words.

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8 thoughts on “Truth Teller

  1. These are great! Our poetry group’s theme next week is politics, maybe I can do a poem about Trump and work those in somehow. Next stop, RhymeZone.com! Of course, the pronunciation will take some practice. Thanks, 227 🙂

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  2. Those words may describe him but I am not sure how he “owns” them. At least, to me, he seems to share them with just about every other politician I’ve seen from the two major parties.

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    1. I mostly used “own” to avoid word repetition – it’s not meant in the way that these things “belong to” him (exclusively). That said, I don’t really believe that most politicians are only self-interested, any more than most teachers are this or most lawyers are that. I would guess that a majority of people working in the government actually do want to do some good and make some meaningful changes. The generalized demonizing that is going politically both here in Europe and now in the States is something that really bothers me.

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      1. I agree that blanket statements such as mine are not accurate or helpful. Also, Trump takes to a new level what I see as an entrenched problem, at least here in the US. He is a caricature of the loud mouthed, sound-bite politician that we have way too many of. Thanks for your post. It is funny and thought provoking

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      2. Thanks! There really does seem to be an ever larger percentage of the loud mouthed type – I assume that perception has to do with an increasing number of journalists seeking exactly this type out, eager to stick a camera and microphone in their faces, symbiotically hoping for the next headline – or as you say rightly – soundbite.

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