Quality Time

A few years ago I joked about putting “Chauffeur” on my résumé. Now I am thinking about adding “Hairdresser” – maybe with an added note: “specializing in African hair and styles”. Last weekend I spent 7 hours learning how to braid in extensions. Today it was the younger daughter’s turn and she decided on twists. That was a relief because they only take about 3 hours, whereas braids can mean anywhere from 8 to 12 hours of work.

As always, we began by negotiating about which series on Netflix we would watch – she vetoed Star Trek Voyager and I vetoed Orange is the New Black. We both know enough by now not to even bother suggesting Pride and Prejudice or Vampire Diaries. We decided on Gilmore Girls. That was a nice mother/daughter thing to do.

And it was like looking in the mirror!

Except that I didn’t give birth to my daughter at 16, I adopted her at age 40. And that our conversations aren’t all fast-paced, witty and sparkly – we tend to have quiet, serious talks interspersed with a lot of not uncomfortable silences. And we don’t talk about boys or dating or my relationship with my own mother – which by the way, is not at all complicated. And we don’t act like girlfriends or lend each other clothes and jewelry . . but sometimes I do catch her wearing my socks.

And sometimes I give up a whole weekend just to see how she smiles at herself in the mirror when we are done.


12 thoughts on “Quality Time

  1. Gold Star for you, 227, for your expertise in African style. Double Gold Star for being the kind of mom willing to spend a weekend twisting hair and bingeing TV. There’s “witty and sparkly” in the ordinariness and silence of life as well as the drama. Your daughter will look at this picture and remind you of that in 20 or 30 years. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  2. That’s amazing work my little Anglophile. Also, that wouldn’t have been tongue in cheek regarding your relationship with your mom, would it?

    By the way, can you tell I’m binge reading your blog right now? You are so prolific!!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. oh – ok – so, now . . . what is an “Anglo”? As for being prolific (previous comment), I am actually something of a slacker in blogworld. My goal was three posts a week. Kept to it for almost all of the first two years. But recently . . . (insert cliche excuses here).
      And now to you – how in the heck have you been? How are your parents doing? Are you adjusting to life in AZ?

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Anglo just meaning us white girls and me being impressed with your twists and braids on your girls. I couldn’t call you Anglophile because Brexit and President Tweet have left you decidedly out of love with the Anglo way of living.

        Arizona is good but we are still running back to Oklahoma for my folks. They are touch and go all the time now. 92 and 89. What are ya gonna do? Thank you for asking. Actually have a trip to Paris scheduled to leave this Sunday but until we are wheels up, I’m not believing we are going. Constant state of “ready” when it comes to my parents.

        I win the universal blogger slacker award. Don’t try to take that from me.


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